So I went to bed and got that sleep!
And I woke up on the Saturday morning with a slight enthusiastic spring in my step. I wasnt sure if my suspicion that my lack of activity was partly to blame for my black fog setting in or not but I did know that I stopped running regularly last autumn and after Christmas the fog started to drift in. So I got up and dragged the husband and baby boy ( he is 5yrs old but will always be my baby boy ) out of the door at 8.20 am on a Saturday morning to get to a local park run for the start at 9am.
And though my little one ran after me crying for me not to go I did set off and I did my first 5k since last october I think. And OMG did it feel good! I could feel the wind in my face I could feel my blood pumping and feel my heart beating! I was alive!
I felt so alive for the first time in such a long time it was amazing. I finished in a very respectable 39 min ( not bad for me my first 5k in over 6 months ) and though my body is aching as I write this I do feel better. I went for a walk today and figured out a new short run near where I now live and have agreed to run with another mum on Tuesday evening. Because I know that running is good for me! I don’t know what it is but it lifts my spirit makes it easier for me to think, it gives me space and time and I am reminded that I am alive!!!
You see when my black fog sets in I don’t feel alive! I feel stale and heavy, I feel like I’m under constant pressure and anxious and when I ran on Saturday morning I felt alive, light, and was even smiling!
This morning I was not as keen to get up or to get going, I wasnt as full of energy but I did get up and I did get going and what made a difference was that I got out in the fresh air to walk and I know I will run again tomorrow helped too!
I have started to think I want to make running a staple part of my lifestyle and so I might be doing more than just a one-off half marathon like I did last time I was running so that I always have another event planned at least for the next year because otherwise I focus on the one race rather than me and just keeping the running up so watch this space as I know I will be doing lots more running if I am to keep it up.
One park run has helped me see the wood from the trees I cant wait to see what I can gain from making this my medicine of choice!
My Path Back To Colour 